The Clan that was different
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The Clan that was different
Here's a new fanfiction that I'm working on! Its totally EPIC Have a laugh!
Warning: Do not drink water while reading this.
The Clan that was different
“Are we there yet?”
Berrynose whined from behind as the ThunderClan patrol maneuvered their way through the woods.
Brambleclaw, who was leading, was in a very bad mood. Earlier on, he had unknowingly tangled his right leg in a thistle bush. It had taken ages before he had finally yanked his badly scratched leg, at the same time, accidentally scraping of some of his leg fur. Now, he had one smoothly shaved right leg.
He let out a hiss of annoyance and snapped,” This is the fifty-sixth time you’re asking that question! The answer is no! EpicClan is nowhere in sight!”
As he spoke, the bushes beside them rustled and the strangest looking cat walked out.
His coat was a mixture of white, gray, silver, black, ginger and brown. His ears were tufted and on his head rested a halo of borage leaves, stringed together.
Jayfeather bristled in alarm and a gasp escaped from his throat. He blurted,” I smell borage leaves!”
“Ahh,” The stranger mewed, his jaws agape in mock surprise,” It seems that your nose is working properly!”
“Borage leaves are consumed by nursing Queens to increase available milk!” Jayfeather replied indignantly, looking aghast.
“Mmm…” The stranger hummed, drowning out Jayfeather’s words, pretending that he didn’t heard anything. He cleared his throat and introduced himself,” I am Epicmoon, the leader of EpicClan!”
“Epicmoon? That isn’t a proper leader’s name at all!” Cloudtail had a look of disgust on his face, taking a few steps back as though he was a contagious disease and edging closer to Brightheart.
“StarClan couldn’t stand the ways of EpicClan and refused our existence. We had to leave Fourtrees and live here. My deputy had suggested me to completely change the ways of our Clan. So the opposite of “star” would be “moon”, am I right?” Epicmoon beamed, looking pleased with his own speech.
“I suppose so…” Cloudtail grunted reluctantly.
“Shall we now proceed to EpicClan’s camp?” Epicmoon offered, gazing at the ThunderClan cats one by one. His eyes were finally riveted on Brightheart, who blushed deeply.
“Ahh, mademoiselle! You are so beautiful beyond the stars – I mean moons!” His eyes shined as he dipped his head in greeting.
Brightheart looked as though she would die of embarrassment and Cloudtail stepped in front of her, his eyes narrowed into furious slits. “She’s my mate! Stay away from her!”
Brambleclaw pushed him aside and forced a smile on his face. “Shall we make our way to your camp?”
When they entered EpicClan’s camp, Brambleclaw glanced around. It just seemed… normal. I wonder what’s so different about this Clan, he thought.
“Meet my deputy, Moonface!” Epicmoon flicked his tail towards the round-faced white tom next to him.
“I now see why your deputy suggested to end leader’s names with “moon”,” Cloudtail muttered under his breath.
“Moonmoon?” Brambleclaw couldn’t help giggling and the EpicClan deputy gave him a withering glare.
“Would you like some leg therapy?” Moonface asked bitterly, eyeing his shaved leg. Brambleclaw immediately ceased laughing, looking as though he was about to rip the EpicClan deputy into shreds.
“Now now,” Epicmoon meowed,” Shall we start on our tour around EpicClan’s camp?”
The ThunderClan cats nodded as they followed the EpicClan leader towards a den.
Inside were three old-looking cats, who were too busy to even notice them. An apprentice was inside too, shredding their mossy nests into shreds. One of them, a brown she-cat grabbed the apprentice’s tail, hissing,” Talonpaw! I can see clearly that you’re destroying our nests!”
Talonpaw sank his teeth into the elder’s paw, as he wriggled out of her grip. “I hate doing these kind of work! Your nests stinks, Grandma!”
As both old and young chased each other about the camp, Epicmoon shrugged at the bewildered ThunderClan cats. “Elders and apprentices are natural enemies.”
“Right!” An elder agreed instantly. “Apprentices are nothing but trouble!”
“And they’re really brainless!” Another added.
Epicmoon sighed as he led the ThunderClan cats to another den. Inside was the smell of herbs and Jayfeather leaned forward in interest, asking,” Is this a medicine cat’s den?”
A small tabby she-cat emerged from the dark den and growled,” Yes and this is my den!”
“Sharptongue,” Epicmoon began with a despondent sigh but was immediately cut off by the tabby cat.
“Do not enter! Do not touch anything! Stay away from the herbs! If I smell your stench in there, I will personally deal with you!” Sharptongue rattled on.
She paused and added sweetly,” Unless you’re sick or injured and you really really need me to help you…”
“DO NOT COME NEAR!” She yowled suddenly and the ThunderClan cats leaped back in fright. As they watch her disappear inside, Jayfeather broke the silence,” Wow. She sure is one of kind.”
Cloudtail was momentarily speechless and mewed after a few heartbeats,” I am never going into that medicine cat’s den. Ever.”
Epicmoon brought them towards another den. “This is the Warriors den. Say hi, Foxdung!”
A ginger tom stepped out and snarled,” Great meeting you. Don’t come back.” With that, he padded back in.
“Foxdung? Isn’t that a horrible name?” Brightheart gasped.
Epicmoon fixed a dazzling smile on her. “Mademoiselle, doesn’t he remind you of one?”
Berrynose snorted,” He smells like one.”
A voice came from inside the warriors den. “I can hear what you’re saying!”
Epicmoon shrugged when he suddenly had a look of horror on his face. “I’ve forgotten! There’s supposed to be a Clan meeting now!”
With one leap, he landed on the tall boulder in the middle of camp and yowled,” Let all cats who are still breathing and alive gather beneath the Moon Rock for a Clan meeting!”
Brambleclaw couldn’t believe what he was hearing but still, he settled down on the ground.
“Just a few words! We have visitors from ThunderClan, do welcome them! Dismissed!”
Cloudtail opened his mouth and closed it stupidly. “Whaat?!”
“And I guess the whole Clan is feeling hungry now,” Epicmoon murmured before yowling,” Alright! Its time for lunch everyone! Single file please! Enjoy the food!”
Almost instantly all the cats rushed towards the fresh-kill pile, fighting over prey.
“We have three courses! Appetizer, main course and dessert! The rabbit legs are very tasty!” The EpicClan leader gushed excitedly.
Berrynose looked eager. “Can we try rabbit legs too, Brambleclaw?”
“No!” The ThunderClan deputy hissed.
“I now thoroughly understand why StarClan couldn’t stand EpicClan,” Cloudtail muttered under his breath.
“We have to go now, Epicmoon,” Brambleclaw nudged the EpicClan leader.
Epicmoon spunned around, bits of rabbit fur in his jaws. “Oh my. Do visit again next time!” he called.
The ThunderClan cats glanced back once more at the EpicClan camp before returning back to their own camp.
THE END
Warning: Do not drink water while reading this.
The Clan that was different
“Are we there yet?”
Berrynose whined from behind as the ThunderClan patrol maneuvered their way through the woods.
Brambleclaw, who was leading, was in a very bad mood. Earlier on, he had unknowingly tangled his right leg in a thistle bush. It had taken ages before he had finally yanked his badly scratched leg, at the same time, accidentally scraping of some of his leg fur. Now, he had one smoothly shaved right leg.
He let out a hiss of annoyance and snapped,” This is the fifty-sixth time you’re asking that question! The answer is no! EpicClan is nowhere in sight!”
As he spoke, the bushes beside them rustled and the strangest looking cat walked out.
His coat was a mixture of white, gray, silver, black, ginger and brown. His ears were tufted and on his head rested a halo of borage leaves, stringed together.
Jayfeather bristled in alarm and a gasp escaped from his throat. He blurted,” I smell borage leaves!”
“Ahh,” The stranger mewed, his jaws agape in mock surprise,” It seems that your nose is working properly!”
“Borage leaves are consumed by nursing Queens to increase available milk!” Jayfeather replied indignantly, looking aghast.
“Mmm…” The stranger hummed, drowning out Jayfeather’s words, pretending that he didn’t heard anything. He cleared his throat and introduced himself,” I am Epicmoon, the leader of EpicClan!”
“Epicmoon? That isn’t a proper leader’s name at all!” Cloudtail had a look of disgust on his face, taking a few steps back as though he was a contagious disease and edging closer to Brightheart.
“StarClan couldn’t stand the ways of EpicClan and refused our existence. We had to leave Fourtrees and live here. My deputy had suggested me to completely change the ways of our Clan. So the opposite of “star” would be “moon”, am I right?” Epicmoon beamed, looking pleased with his own speech.
“I suppose so…” Cloudtail grunted reluctantly.
“Shall we now proceed to EpicClan’s camp?” Epicmoon offered, gazing at the ThunderClan cats one by one. His eyes were finally riveted on Brightheart, who blushed deeply.
“Ahh, mademoiselle! You are so beautiful beyond the stars – I mean moons!” His eyes shined as he dipped his head in greeting.
Brightheart looked as though she would die of embarrassment and Cloudtail stepped in front of her, his eyes narrowed into furious slits. “She’s my mate! Stay away from her!”
Brambleclaw pushed him aside and forced a smile on his face. “Shall we make our way to your camp?”
When they entered EpicClan’s camp, Brambleclaw glanced around. It just seemed… normal. I wonder what’s so different about this Clan, he thought.
“Meet my deputy, Moonface!” Epicmoon flicked his tail towards the round-faced white tom next to him.
“I now see why your deputy suggested to end leader’s names with “moon”,” Cloudtail muttered under his breath.
“Moonmoon?” Brambleclaw couldn’t help giggling and the EpicClan deputy gave him a withering glare.
“Would you like some leg therapy?” Moonface asked bitterly, eyeing his shaved leg. Brambleclaw immediately ceased laughing, looking as though he was about to rip the EpicClan deputy into shreds.
“Now now,” Epicmoon meowed,” Shall we start on our tour around EpicClan’s camp?”
The ThunderClan cats nodded as they followed the EpicClan leader towards a den.
Inside were three old-looking cats, who were too busy to even notice them. An apprentice was inside too, shredding their mossy nests into shreds. One of them, a brown she-cat grabbed the apprentice’s tail, hissing,” Talonpaw! I can see clearly that you’re destroying our nests!”
Talonpaw sank his teeth into the elder’s paw, as he wriggled out of her grip. “I hate doing these kind of work! Your nests stinks, Grandma!”
As both old and young chased each other about the camp, Epicmoon shrugged at the bewildered ThunderClan cats. “Elders and apprentices are natural enemies.”
“Right!” An elder agreed instantly. “Apprentices are nothing but trouble!”
“And they’re really brainless!” Another added.
Epicmoon sighed as he led the ThunderClan cats to another den. Inside was the smell of herbs and Jayfeather leaned forward in interest, asking,” Is this a medicine cat’s den?”
A small tabby she-cat emerged from the dark den and growled,” Yes and this is my den!”
“Sharptongue,” Epicmoon began with a despondent sigh but was immediately cut off by the tabby cat.
“Do not enter! Do not touch anything! Stay away from the herbs! If I smell your stench in there, I will personally deal with you!” Sharptongue rattled on.
She paused and added sweetly,” Unless you’re sick or injured and you really really need me to help you…”
“DO NOT COME NEAR!” She yowled suddenly and the ThunderClan cats leaped back in fright. As they watch her disappear inside, Jayfeather broke the silence,” Wow. She sure is one of kind.”
Cloudtail was momentarily speechless and mewed after a few heartbeats,” I am never going into that medicine cat’s den. Ever.”
Epicmoon brought them towards another den. “This is the Warriors den. Say hi, Foxdung!”
A ginger tom stepped out and snarled,” Great meeting you. Don’t come back.” With that, he padded back in.
“Foxdung? Isn’t that a horrible name?” Brightheart gasped.
Epicmoon fixed a dazzling smile on her. “Mademoiselle, doesn’t he remind you of one?”
Berrynose snorted,” He smells like one.”
A voice came from inside the warriors den. “I can hear what you’re saying!”
Epicmoon shrugged when he suddenly had a look of horror on his face. “I’ve forgotten! There’s supposed to be a Clan meeting now!”
With one leap, he landed on the tall boulder in the middle of camp and yowled,” Let all cats who are still breathing and alive gather beneath the Moon Rock for a Clan meeting!”
Brambleclaw couldn’t believe what he was hearing but still, he settled down on the ground.
“Just a few words! We have visitors from ThunderClan, do welcome them! Dismissed!”
Cloudtail opened his mouth and closed it stupidly. “Whaat?!”
“And I guess the whole Clan is feeling hungry now,” Epicmoon murmured before yowling,” Alright! Its time for lunch everyone! Single file please! Enjoy the food!”
Almost instantly all the cats rushed towards the fresh-kill pile, fighting over prey.
“We have three courses! Appetizer, main course and dessert! The rabbit legs are very tasty!” The EpicClan leader gushed excitedly.
Berrynose looked eager. “Can we try rabbit legs too, Brambleclaw?”
“No!” The ThunderClan deputy hissed.
“I now thoroughly understand why StarClan couldn’t stand EpicClan,” Cloudtail muttered under his breath.
“We have to go now, Epicmoon,” Brambleclaw nudged the EpicClan leader.
Epicmoon spunned around, bits of rabbit fur in his jaws. “Oh my. Do visit again next time!” he called.
The ThunderClan cats glanced back once more at the EpicClan camp before returning back to their own camp.
THE END
Last edited by Iceclaw on December 30th 2011, 20:36; edited 2 times in total
Frost- Global Moderator
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Nyx- IceClan Warrior
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Re: The Clan that was different
Thanks! :3 More to come!
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Re: The Clan that was different
Lol I love it Iceclaw! I cant wait to see more Epicmoon is my fav so far. Well, besides epic Brambleclaw :3
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Re: The Clan that was different
Wow that's a bit funny. Some of the sentences are really hillarious. Hopefully I can read more of this EpicClan. ;D
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Re: The Clan that was different
I'm glad that everyone enjoyed it! Its kinda rushed though. Haha
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Re: The Clan that was different
I kind of missed the warning and I was drinking Coke as I read this. Well, other than that little accident, I thought this story was great.
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Re: The Clan that was different
LOL! This is hilarious! Epicmoon? Epicclan? Doesn`t Dreamcloud want to make Epicclan?
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Re: The Clan that was different
Yep she's planning to! xD haha thanks guys!
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Re: The Clan that was different
Too bad EpicClan couldn't help, against DF, but then they might just get in the way. Funny fan fic Iceclaw.
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Re: The Clan that was different
Ya! Epicmoon? Haha. XD I can`t stop laughing at that name.
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Re: The Clan that was different
Im not surprised StarClan couldn't tolerate EpicClan!!
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Re: The Clan that was different
Ya, me too! I wouldn`t if I was in Starclan, anyways.
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Re: The Clan that was different
Well Fang. I could help you with that if you want.
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Re: The Clan that was different
Yeah, you should do one about IceClan, Iceclaw! Shuriken doing something funny.....
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Re: The Clan that was different
Haha I love it, hilarious! And about EpicClan, Dreamcloud decided to change it and make SunClan
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Re: The Clan that was different
Glad you guys enjoyed this fanfic
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Re: The Clan that was different
Lol comedic piece? That was a nice read. I love how unique it is compared to other fanfiction pieces on this site. I didn't realize this piece was focused more on comedy than anything else until I was done reading it. This was a very clever way to introduce a new clan with such different styles and a new set of codes that contradicts all of the moral codes of the traditional warrior clans. Overall, the comedy aspect was a refreshing, new style of writing I haven't come across on this site before.
The organization of the story was very good. You are doing a much better job breaking up the dialogue properly. I did notice, however, that there were times there were either needless paragraph breaks or they were not separated in the proper places. It left me a little confused in the beginning because I thought you may have been trying to switch to a different focal point in the story. If you would like I would be happy to help with this for future pieces. Just send me a private message if you decide you are interested.
I loved the names. Were they all names from the Warriors Series? (It's been a while since I have read it.)If so I really loved the idea of throwing this new clan in there and showing the dramatic reaction the clan cats of the story would possibly have. Again I would like to see more detail. I always seem to stress this with you (lol). I want to know a little bit more about what the warriors are doing before they arrive in EpicClan. I know Brambleclaw mentioned it looking like their own camps? Maybe describing what parts seemed the same. I'd also like to see a bit of the plot at the beginning. What were the clans doing that led them the Epicclan maybe?
I loved the piece. I'd like to see more of these comedy style pieces around the forum and I'm excited to start working with you on your fanfiction pieces one one one. Your use of vocabulary is very good. Espeically at your age and you have quite a tallent for writing.
I definitely recommend this read to anyone looking for a twist on the traditional fanfiction styles of this forum.
The organization of the story was very good. You are doing a much better job breaking up the dialogue properly. I did notice, however, that there were times there were either needless paragraph breaks or they were not separated in the proper places. It left me a little confused in the beginning because I thought you may have been trying to switch to a different focal point in the story. If you would like I would be happy to help with this for future pieces. Just send me a private message if you decide you are interested.
I loved the names. Were they all names from the Warriors Series? (It's been a while since I have read it.)If so I really loved the idea of throwing this new clan in there and showing the dramatic reaction the clan cats of the story would possibly have. Again I would like to see more detail. I always seem to stress this with you (lol). I want to know a little bit more about what the warriors are doing before they arrive in EpicClan. I know Brambleclaw mentioned it looking like their own camps? Maybe describing what parts seemed the same. I'd also like to see a bit of the plot at the beginning. What were the clans doing that led them the Epicclan maybe?
I loved the piece. I'd like to see more of these comedy style pieces around the forum and I'm excited to start working with you on your fanfiction pieces one one one. Your use of vocabulary is very good. Espeically at your age and you have quite a tallent for writing.
I definitely recommend this read to anyone looking for a twist on the traditional fanfiction styles of this forum.
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Re: The Clan that was different
i really enjoy comedy. i agree, you are pretty good at writing stories, probably because you've written many. you kind of remind me of Hazeldust; she's only my age and she uses such complicated words. the teacher asks her what they mean. o.O my other friend has an accidental talent for wording too... you're kind of a mix between both.
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Re: The Clan that was different
Haha Epicmoon? Yeah a strange name for a leader and Moonmoon. EpicClan sure is epic haha
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Re: The Clan that was different
I like it Iceclaw.. haha so funny! ^_^ I like Moonface.. lol Moonmoon! ^_^ keep writing
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